Implausible Claims Made by Vanilla Ice in His 1990 No. 1 Hit “Ice Ice Baby.”

“Ice is back with my brand-new invention.”

“Turn off the lights and I’ll glow.”

“I rock a mike like a vandal.”

“I’m killin’ your brain like a poisonous mushroom.”

“I’m cooking MCs like a pound of bacon.”

“I go crazy when I hear a cymbal and a high hat.”

“I grabbed my nine.”

“I’m a lyrical poet.”

“My style’s like a chemical spill.”

“If my rhyme was a drug, I’d sell it by the gram.”

“If there was a problem, yo, I’ll solve it.”