“Jeffrey Toobin, CNN’s chief legal analyst and a renowned reporter for The New Yorker, has been sidelined at a pivotal moment in the run-up to the presidential election. The reason: He exposed himself during a Zoom call with colleagues in what he says was an accident.” — CNN, 10/19/20

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1. Your dick is on fire.

2. You are having a dick-relevant exam via telehealth.

3. You are a baby and it’s your virtual bris.

4. You are in a literal dick-measuring contest.

5. You are doing an Airbnb virtual experience.

6. You got a new kitten and named it “Your Dick.”

7. You finally got that audition for Equus.

8. Your dick is catching up with all its high school dicks.

9. There is someone who has asked, out loud, with the consent of all parties on Zoom, “would you please show us your dick?”

10. It’s dick day in health class.