Plain M&Ms: You DVR C-SPAN.

Circus Peanuts: You will vote for Trump on November 28th.

Sugar Daddies or Charleston Chews: You were an active Taft supporter, and you may sport similar facial hair.

Swedish Fish: You don’t understand why they are called Swedish fish, like WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN, and you are considering voting for Gary Johnson.

Kit Kat: Socialist.

Fun Dip or Pixy Stix: You are in a diabetic coma and, therefore, you are unaware of the current election. Some of your friends are jealous of you about this.

Twizzlers: You have avoided politics ever since you ran unopposed for student council in middle school and lost.

Candy Corn: Ignorance is bliss.

Reese’s Pieces: When considering your vote, you think: What would The Dude do?

Skittles: You still don’t understand what a hanging chad is, but you suspect it has something to do with Chad Michael Murray and his athletic abilities.

Laffy Taffy: Whenever someone mentions TPP, you scream “YEAH, YOU KNOW ME!” Every. Single. Time.

Airheads: You’ve plagiarized one of Michelle Obama’s speeches.

Nerds: You’ve published a long-form essay questioning the stability of capitalist governments and/or you own a framed photo of Nate Silver.

Sour Patch Kids: Miley Cyrus 2024!

Whoppers or any candy run through an X-ray machine: You get all of your political news coverage from Russian government sponsored television and/or you are Julian Assange.