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Articles by
Sarah Garb
Sarah Garb lives in California with her husband and their two favorite psychological manipulators. She is 85% sure it wasn’t her who pooped on the carpet.
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June 7, 2022Style Questionnaire for “It’s on Backwards”: The Clothing Subscription Box for Preschoolers
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December 13, 2021We Feel You Have Not Been Sufficiently Notified of Our School’s Early Dismissal on Friday
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June 1, 2018Yes, Your Toddler Is Gaslighting You
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November 17, 2011Crate and Barrel Furniture or Character from The Wire?
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February 3, 2011Ingredients in Tostitos Hint of Lime Chips
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October 15, 2009Lowest Priority H1N1 Vaccine Groups
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August 5, 2005Lesser-Known Movie Prequels
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August 20, 2003McSweeney’s Brain Exploder: Revenge of the Hunt and Peckers
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September 16, 2002Actual and Made-up Adages Used to Promote the Consumption of Pork
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June 3, 2002Signatures Available from Print Shop’s Certificate Maker Program
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September 22, 2023It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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September 15, 2023Son, You’re Old Enough to Know the Truth, There is No Such Thing as the “Invisible Hand of the Market”
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September 22, 2023Welcome to Rosalita’s Boarding House for Girls and Women Rescued by Bruce Springsteen from Dead-End Small Towns
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September 28, 2023A Template for Right-Wingers Upset with Taylor Swift
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October 2, 2023Thank You for Submitting Your Homeless Shelter Application, but We’ve Decided to Use City Funds for Thirty-Five New Pickleball Courts Instead
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October 2, 2023McSweeney’s Books: A Conversation with Dave Eggers About His Book, The Eyes and the Impossible
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October 2, 2023If Burger King’s Jingle “Whopper Whopper” Were the Only Literary Form
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September 29, 2023I’m Your Three-Year-Old Interior Designer and This Is Your New Home Makeover