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Articles by
Sarah Garb
Sarah Garb lives in California with her husband and their two favorite psychological manipulators. She is 85% sure it wasn’t her who pooped on the carpet.
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June 7, 2022Style Questionnaire for “It’s on Backwards”: The Clothing Subscription Box for Preschoolers
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December 13, 2021We Feel You Have Not Been Sufficiently Notified of Our School’s Early Dismissal on Friday
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June 1, 2018Yes, Your Toddler Is Gaslighting You
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November 17, 2011Crate and Barrel Furniture or Character from The Wire?
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February 3, 2011Ingredients in Tostitos Hint of Lime Chips
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October 15, 2009Lowest Priority H1N1 Vaccine Groups
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August 5, 2005Lesser-Known Movie Prequels
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August 20, 2003McSweeney’s Brain Exploder: Revenge of the Hunt and Peckers
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September 16, 2002Actual and Made-up Adages Used to Promote the Consumption of Pork
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June 3, 2002Signatures Available from Print Shop’s Certificate Maker Program
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June 28, 2022We Are an Anti-Abortion Couple, and Don’t Worry, We Will Adopt Your Baby
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January 14, 2022What Your Favorite Sad Dad Band Says About You
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June 14, 2022My Favorite Controlled Substance Is Daycare
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June 27, 2022We Would Do Something, But Then We Wouldn’t Have the Power to Do Something, So We Can’t Do Something
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July 1, 2022FAQ: Freedom
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July 1, 2022A Declaration of Independence from the United States Supreme Court
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July 1, 2022Laws Should Be Based Solely on the Words of Constitutional Authors Like Me, the Guy Who Died After Shoving a Piece of Whalebone in His Dick
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June 30, 2022I’d Rather Drag Your Lifeless Body from This Party Than Wait Here While You Go to the Bathroom