McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
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Short Imagined Monologues
Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.
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August 19, 2005Alfred Hitchcock Complains About His Hotel Room
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August 4, 2005“The Macho Man” Randy Savage Goes to the Doctor
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July 13, 2005Morgan Freeman Buys a Pop-A-Shot Machine
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June 21, 2005Thak, The Most Organized Member Of The Party Of Roughly 70 People Who Originally Settled North America
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June 10, 2005George Jefferson’s Thoughts on Mind and Style
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May 3, 2005Bit Bit, Speak!: A Monologue From the Canine Companion Of Britney Spears And Kevin Federline
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April 21, 2005Microsoft Office Assistant: The Paper Clip
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April 4, 2005What It Is to Love and Lose: Groucho Marx
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March 16, 20052008 Presidential Stump Speech of Billy Bush, Cousin of George W. Bush and Access Hollywood Entertainment Reporter
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August 17, 2004Meat Loaf: On Commitment to Varsity Cheerleaders
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August 4, 2004Beware, the Shark!
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June 29, 2004An Aging Kelis, Years from Now, Reflects on a Milkshake Long Expired, but How the Boys, Ah, the Boys Remain
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April 21, 2025Getting Ahead of It: JD Vance Almost Definitely Didn’t Kill the Pope
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April 25, 2025This Five-Hundred-Word Bumper Sticker on My Tesla Explains Why I’m Not a Bad Person
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April 9, 2025US News & World Report’s Best Remaining Colleges, 2028
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April 18, 2025The Elementary School Disciplinary Record of Jesus Christ
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