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Articles by
Keaton Patti
Keaton is a writer and comedian living in New York City. He has contributed writings for The New Yorker, Comedy Central, The Onion, Funny or Die, CollegeHumor and McSweeney’s Quarterly and Internet Tendency. He is also a performer on the Upright Citizens Brigade Harold team Some Kid and an alum of the UCB Touring Company.
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May 24, 2018An Introduction to The Pick-Up Artist’s Way
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April 5, 2018This Eulogy is Branded Content
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December 13, 2017Ajit Pai’s Dream of the Future
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July 6, 2017Healthcare Promo Codes
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June 23, 2017This Coffee Shop Chooses Not to Have Wi-Fi
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March 21, 2017Every Sean Spicer Press Briefing
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February 28, 2017The Steps Needed to Cast Bill Murray In Your Film
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December 20, 20162016: A Reboot of 1984
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September 27, 2016Rebunking Conspiracy Theories: 9/11
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August 31, 2016Rebunking Conspiracy Theories: Harambe
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August 23, 2016Rebunking Conspiracy Theories: Technology Suppression
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July 13, 2016Rebunking Conspiracy Theories: False Deaths
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January 24, 2023Macroeconomic Changes Have Made It Impossible for Me to Want to Pay You
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May 13, 2022Ten Possibilities the Applebee’s Waitress Considers Before It Occurs to Her the Women in Booth Fourteen Might Be a Couple with Two Children
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January 19, 2023Oh God, Someone Gave Me Whiskey Stones
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January 10, 2023Fifteen Long-Overdue Slang Terms for Female Masturbation