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All posts tagged
football
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October 14, 2011American Policy Suggestions from a Chicago Sports Fan: Curb Chinese Currency Manipulation by Benching Jay Cutler
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February 4, 2011There Were Multiple Infractions On the Previous Play
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February 3, 2011Words That Could Conceivably Be Used to Describe Both the Super Bowl and a Superb Owl
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December 9, 2010Quote from a 2010 Brett Favre Post-Game Interview, or Last Words of a Dying Celebrity?
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October 27, 2010Non-Essential Mnemonics: “Really? You’re cheering for Michael ‘I Murder Animals’ Vick? Get the hell out.”
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June 14, 2010Non-Essential Mnemonics: Stop crying. Never cross Stevie Wonder. Muzzle that hurtful, nasty woman: Pelosi. Nuke Moscow. Soooooo overdue. Never trust Malaysian geishas to giggle well. They giggle horribly. After Clinton, this nation didn’t fix itself. I fixed it!
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February 5, 2010I Am the Man Who Paints His Entire Head and Face to Resemble the Helmet of His Favorite Football Team
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November 2, 2009Non-Essential Mnemonics: “Steroids Ruined Baseball. Lemme at Those Cheaters! [Expletive] A-Rod!”
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October 27, 2009Matt Saracen, Dillon, Texas High School Quarterback, Plays in His First Game Back Since Visiting The Art Institute of Chicago as a Prospective Student
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December 22, 2008Recovered Scenes From the Tragedy Plaxico by William Shakespeare
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February 19, 2021I’m a Short Afternoon Walk and You’re Putting Way Too Much Pressure on Me
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February 22, 2021The UX on this Small Child Is Terrible
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February 24, 2021I Oppose the Democrats’ Plan to Lower Child Poverty. If Kids Want to Eat, They Should Work In Filthy Factories Like They Did in the Good Old Days
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February 16, 2021As a Superhero Teacher, I Can’t Wait to Sacrifice My Unvaccinated Life for Your Child
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March 1, 2021How to Succeed At Apologizing for Sexual Harassment Without Really Trying
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March 1, 2021No, Our Company Is Not “Anti-Union,” We Simply Believe That It Is in Our Best Interest to Quash Any Attempt by Our Employees to Collectively Bargain on Their Behalf