1. Grimly.

2. With grim resignation.

3. Sighing with grim resignation.

4. Grimly, with furrowed brow.

5. Grimly, with furrowed brow emerging from underneath a layer of “anti-gravity smoothing serum.”

6. Grimly, with furrowed brow emerging from underneath a layer of “anti-gravity smoothing serum,” while simultaneously receiving an overdraft notice from our bank after purchase of serums from Sephora.

7. Grimly, moments after deleting and subsequently re-downloading the application.

8. Optimistically?

9. Grimly, certain that life is meaningless, love is a joke, and that Sephora is run by a goblin who has promised us a baby if we can just spin straw into gold, but by “spin straw into gold” he really means enter data fifty hours a week for minimum wage while purchasing serums and telling ourselves that someday we will make it in the “gig economy.”

10. Grimly, but keeping our views on the Sephora-goblin to ourselves.