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McSweeney’s
Internet TendencyDaily humor almost every day.
Daily humor
almost every day
since 1998.
EVENTS

NEW YORK: See Dave Eggers and Tabitha St. Bernard, one of the founders of the Women’s March, talk about youth activism and other topics at Books of Wonder. February 27 at 7:30 pm.

Short Imagined Monologues

Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.

  • September 22, 2014
    Monologue: Glengarry, Bob Ross
    by Zack Wortman
  • September 16, 2014
    Monologue: Alexander Graham Bell Has Had Just About Enough of Your Shit
    by Charlie Stockman
  • September 12, 2014
    Monologue: Botticelli’s Venus Wants You to Go Away
    by Kate Hahn
  • September 9, 2014
    Monologue: Yeah, Well the Weather Doesn’t Want to Talk About You Either
    by Sam Corrao Clanon
  • September 5, 2014
    Monologue: Tennessee Titans’ Head Coach Ken Whisenhunt’s Spirit Animal is a Football
    by Devin Schiff
  • August 20, 2014
    Monologue: A Few Words from Roscoe’s Italian Eatery and Café’s Human Billboard and Doomsayer
    by Peter Harmelin
  • August 11, 2014
    Monologue: The Owner of Sharky’s Big and Tall By the Beach Addresses Some Nasty Rumors
    by Brian Boone
  • July 8, 2014
    Monologue: I’m the Guy Who Ties the Scarves Onto Steven Tyler’s Mic Stand
    by Lukas Drake
  • June 26, 2014
    Monologue: A Few Words from the Scientist Who Invented Wonder Woman’s Invisible Jet
    by David Ng
  • June 23, 2014
    Monologue: A Bear Explains How to Survive a Bear Attack
    by Janelle Blasdel
  • June 16, 2014
    Monologue: I Feel Like I’m the Only One Who’s Trying to Get This Narcissist Support Group Off the Ground
    by Dan Rozier
  • June 5, 2014
    Monologue: Hi, I’m the New Guy With a Really Bad Cold
    by Bret Gunter
⇦ … 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 … ⇨
Trending 🔥
  1. February 13, 2019
    Don’t Get Married Before You Live Together
    by Ginny Hogan
  2. February 8, 2019
    List: Word Problems for the Race Conscious
    by Dymir Arthur
  3. January 30, 2019
    Monologue: I Am a Stryker-X Assault Backpack, and This Airport Lounge Is an Insult
    by Tom Ellison
  4. February 19, 2019
    Don’t Let the Pigeon Build a Border Wall!
    by Clancy Tripp
Recently
  • February 22, 2019
    Sophocles’ Acceptance Speech for Best Original Tragedy
    by Arthur Imperatore and Brian Geiger
  • February 22, 2019
    List: My 2019 Oscar Night Predictions
    by Wendi Aarons
  • February 22, 2019
    Don’t Call It a Comeback: Animated Features Forthcoming From John Lasseter’s New Studio
    by Kimberly Harrington
  • February 22, 2019
    List: Things That Outnumber Women Who’ve Been Nominated for an Oscar for Best Director
    by Jesse Shamon
McSweeney’s is a publishing company based in San Francisco.
As well as operating a daily humor website, we also publish Timothy McSweeney’s Quarterly Concern and an ever-growing selection of books under various imprints. You can buy all of these things from our online store. We’re also transitioning to a nonprofit and would greatly appreciate your help. You can support us today by making a donation.
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