The Believer Magazine
Short Imagined Monologues
Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.
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March 12, 2020I’m Representative Katie Porter’s Whiteboard, and My Girl and I Are About to Kick Your Ass
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February 13, 2020I’m the Valentine’s Card Your Three-Year-Old Made
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January 31, 2020Punxsutawney Phil Drunk Dials His High School Crush
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January 21, 2020Hi, I’m a Billboard Lawyer
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December 31, 2019I’m Your Boyfriend, Proposing to You in Times Square On New Year’s Eve
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December 18, 2019I Am Your Big Mouth Billy Bass, and I Only Sing Schubert’s “Erlkönig” Now
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December 16, 2019I Am Lady Macbeth, and Your Facebook Post About Your Kid’s Early Acceptance to Harvard Really Pisses Me Off
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December 13, 2019I’m the Duolingo Owl and I’m Tired of Your Bullshit
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December 9, 2019I Am the Final Question On Your Calculus Exam
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December 2, 2019I’m the Host of a Prestigious TV News Show, and I Invite You to Come On-Air to Bullshit Me
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December 2, 2019I Am a Patagonia Vest Warrior Who Conquers Digital Mountains of Excel Spreadsheets
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November 26, 2019I Am the President’s Pardoned Turkey. Please Kill Me
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