Lists

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Send your list submissions to lists@mcsweeneys.net.

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Chinese Restaurant Menu Items That Sound Like Titles of Cocteau Twins’ Songs
by Scott Heim (5/8/2012)

Epitaphs from Oregon Trail After Some Eighth Grade Boys Had Used the Computer
by Anna Breslaw (5/3/2012)

Ben Geller-Willick’s Lost Friends Episodes
by Michael McGrath and Richard Lawson (4/26/2012)

50 Shades to Leave Your Lover
by Max Lakin (4/24/2012)

Fake Massachusetts Towns
by Michael Andor Brodeur (4/12/2012)

Sociological Observations of Norwegian Black Metal Bands
by Austin S. Matthews (4/10/2012)

News Headlines From My Apartment
by Stef Willen (4/5/2012)

Things I Said to My Infantry Platoon in Afghanistan, and What I Probably Should Have Said Instead
by Matthew Mobley (3/20/2012)

Honest Spotify Playlists
by Patrick McKay (3/15/2012)

Fitness Magazine Has Some Questions for You
by Maria Adelmann (3/13/2012)

Hipster Logic Problems
by Larry Fleury (3/8/2012)

Mathematical Translations of Popular Refrains
by Kristopher Kelly (3/6/2012)

New Food Mashups
by Miles Kahn (2/28/2012)

Rejected AWP Panels
by Dan Moreau (2/25/2012)

Lines from The Princess Bride that Double as Comments on Freshman Composition Papers
by Jennifer Simonson (2/23/2012)

Job Interview Responses From a Millennial Liberal Arts Major
by Michael McBain (2/16/2012)

New and Noteworthy Name Generators
by Allen Rein (2/7/2012)

Jazz Standards Updated for the Modern Young Lady
by Andi Sharavsky (1/24/2012)

Things Liberal Arts Graduates Never Like Hearing
by Rocky Rakovic (1/20/2012)

A Day’s Worth of Facts to Get You Through Wikipedia’s 24-Hour Blackout
by Ben Greenman (1/18/2012)

Articles of the U.S. Constitution
by Grace Gordon (1/12/2012)

Important New Emoticons
by Mira Ptacin (1/6/2012)

Sexting Ice Breakers for English Grad Students
by Hollie Adams (1/4/2012)

Fun Holiday Recipes for Self-Sufficient Singles
by Amy Cannon (12/23/2011)

All-Inclusive Holiday Songs
by Jill Jaracz (12/21/2011)

Holiday Beers
by Meg Pokrass (12/19/2011)

Phobias of the Modern Teen
by Jill Bronfman (12/14/2011)

DSM-5 Diagnoses for Toad from Arnold Lobel’s Frog and Toad Stories
by Amy Powell Faeskorn (12/12/2011)

Quotes From My TED Talk
by Wendy Molyneux (12/8/2011)

Band Math
by Jonathan San (12/6/2011)

Super Short CliffsNotes for All Classic Novels
by Arielle Zibrak (12/1/2011)

Passive-Aggressive Films
by Kevin Deutsch (11/29/2011)

Crate and Barrel Furniture or Character from The Wire?
by Sarah Garb (11/17/2011)

Seven Bar Jokes Involving Grammar and Punctuation
by Eric K. Auld (11/8/2011)

Honest Chat Room Acronyms
by Bryan Cook (11/3/2011)

Bear Market
by Brendan Fitzgibbons (10/27/2011)

My Ballet Teacher’s Increasingly Threatening Metaphors for Lifting the Pelvic Floor
by Amy Schleunes (10/21/2011)

My Love for You
by John de Guzman (10/13/2011)

A History of Pizza Hut’s New Product Releases, 2002-2042
by Simon Rich (10/11/2011)

Beyond the 4th Wall
by Dan Markowitz (9/29/2011)

Proposed Additions to the Internet Lexicon
by Brandon Scott Gorrell (9/20/2011)

Thereof On Steroids
by Jessica Goldkind and Rebecca Azhdam (9/13/2011)

What Your Favorite ’80s Band Says About You, Part 2
by John Peck (9/8/2011)

TV Pitches From a Guy Whose Girlfriend Broke Up With Him Forty-Five Minutes Before the Pitch Meeting
by Ravi Mangla (9/1/2011)

The Candy Encyclopedia of American Literature
by Katie Pappageorge (8/30/2011)

For Those Starting Philosophy on Monday
by Jack Graham (8/25/2011)

2011 NBA Rookie Projections (Lockout-Adjusted)
by Chris Grace (8/18/2011)

Your Hollywood Internship Welcome Packet
by Joe Cristalli and Rob Turbovsky (8/11/2011)

Ineffective Pick-Up Lines for the Modern Internet Persona
by Stephanie Georgopulos (8/9/2011)

Things the Doctor Really Said When Called About the Monkeys Jumping On the Bed
by Vince Eckert (8/3/2011)

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