Lists

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Send your list submissions to lists@mcsweeneys.net.

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Actual Similes (and One Metaphor) Found in Teacher Education Texts
by Elizabeth Cunningham (11/27/2012)

The Modern-Day Pantheon
by Katie Brookoff (11/16/2012)

Things In an Organic Chemistry Lab That Sound Dirty, But Aren’t
by Lizzy Scheibel (11/15/2012)

Actual Musicals That Could Be Academic Journals If They Had Their Exclamation Marks Removed
by Alan Finlayson (11/7/2012)

Horror Film Quote or Internet Dating Site First Date?
by Sarah Marcus (10/31/2012)

Halloween Costumes I Already Have in My Closet
by Wendi Aarons (10/31/2012)

Manhattan Coffee Shop or Material Used in the Construction of a Traditional Powhatan Indian Longhouse?
by Will Bareford (10/25/2012)

Five Stay-At-Home Mom Lists of Lists That I’ve Started But Won’t Finish Because I Am a Stay-At-Mom and Don’t Have the Time
by Andrea Fox (10/23/2012)

Seasonal Candy Affective Disorder
by Lauren Le Vine (10/18/2012)

Early American Presidential Voting Blocs
by Miles Kahn (10/16/2012)

Names of Nail Polishes My 74-Year-Old Grandma Barb Would Just Love
by Angela Petrella (10/11/2012)

Lesser-Known Paradoxes
by David Yontz (10/9/2012)

What Your Favorite Classic NES Video Game Says About You
by John Peck (10/4/2012)

Inchoate Versions of Band Names
by Nick Leggatt and Robert Jenkins (9/27/2012)

Small Poetry Journal Names That Reflect the True Nature of Writing Poetry
by Elizabeth Bastos (9/20/2012)

Ailment or Florida?
by Mike Zuckerman (9/13/2012)

McSweeney’s Lists My Friend Heather Would Have Submitted Had She Beat Cancer
by Sheridan MacAuley (9/6/2012)

Several Phrases More Accurate Than “This Isn’t My First Rodeo.”
by Ben Slotky (8/23/2012)

Places Blondes Don’t Have More Fun
by Julia Leggett (8/21/2012)

Features I Demand In a Home After Watching HGTV’s House Hunters
by Ashleigh Lambert (8/16/2012)

Screening Questions for Potential Roommates (Based on Ten Years of Living with Strangers)
by Caroline Hansen (8/9/2012)

Useful New Internet Error Messages
by Rupinder Gill (8/7/2012)

Questions From a Helpless Megabus Passenger
by Sarah Isaacson (8/2/2012)

Dives Not Recognized by the Olympic Diving Committee
by Peter Schooff (7/27/2012)

Your Password Must Contain the Following
by Eric K. Auld (7/26/2012)

A Love Story in Status Codes
by Justin Robert Souza (7/24/2012)

Pre-Internet Companies Rebranded as Modern-Day Start-Ups
by Mike Lacher (7/19/2012)

Suggested Buzzfeed Articles
by Jory John (7/17/2012)

Hall & Joyce Carol Oates’ Greatest Hits
by Langan Kingsley (7/11/2012)

Glam Rock Front Man or U.S. President Between Jackson and Lincoln?
by Christopher Flores (7/3/2012)

Things Therapists Say When They Realize You’re a Lost Cause
by Kristine Angelino (6/29/2012)

Counterintuitive Cover Stories in The Atlantic Magazine
by Zachary Pincus-Roth (6/21/2012)

Poetic Form or Star Trek Villain?
by Allen Rein (6/14/2012)

Don Draper Rates the Strength of Your WiFi Password
by James Ramsay (6/7/2012)

Possible Titles for a Self-Portrait at 42
by Amorak Huey (5/31/2012)

Increasingly Threatening Taglines for Beauty Products
by Kendra Eash (5/24/2012)

Boy Scout Merit Badge Projects
by Jerry Renek (5/22/2012)

Three Steps for Exciting Storytelling
by Colin Hunt (5/17/2012)

The Ten Commandments of Pointless Office Meetings
by Anika Fajardo (5/10/2012)

Chinese Restaurant Menu Items That Sound Like Titles of Cocteau Twins’ Songs
by Scott Heim (5/8/2012)

Epitaphs from Oregon Trail After Some Eighth Grade Boys Had Used the Computer
by Anna Breslaw (5/3/2012)

Ben Geller-Willick’s Lost Friends Episodes
by Michael McGrath and Richard Lawson (4/26/2012)

50 Shades to Leave Your Lover
by Max Lakin (4/24/2012)

Fake Massachusetts Towns
by Michael Andor Brodeur (4/12/2012)

Sociological Observations of Norwegian Black Metal Bands
by Austin S. Matthews (4/10/2012)

News Headlines From My Apartment
by Stef Willen (4/5/2012)

Things I Said to My Infantry Platoon in Afghanistan, and What I Probably Should Have Said Instead
by Matthew Mobley (3/20/2012)

Honest Spotify Playlists
by Patrick McKay (3/15/2012)

Fitness Magazine Has Some Questions for You
by Maria Adelmann (3/13/2012)

Hipster Logic Problems
by Larry Fleury (3/8/2012)

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