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Daily humor almost every day since 1998.
Daily humor almost every day since 1998.
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Short Imagined Monologues

Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.

  • January 26, 2017
    I’m a Flawed Character from a Critically Acclaimed Television Show
    by Hershal Pandya
  • January 23, 2017
    I Bring the Soul-Defiling Spirit of True Norwegian Black Metal to Our Corporate Office Environment
    by Rowdy Geirsson
  • January 12, 2017
    I Tried to Order Coffee During a Date, But Had a Crisis About Systemic Bias Instead
    by Elana Spivack
  • January 11, 2017
    Vsem Dasvidaniya!: An Expelled Russian Diplomat Says Goodbye to NYC
    by Michael Maiello
  • January 9, 2017
    Simone de Beauvoir: SAT Tutor
    by Olivia Ciacci
  • January 4, 2017
    President Obama’s Final Weekly Address
    by Nihar Patel
  • January 3, 2017
    I’m the Female Voice in a Shoe Commercial and I’ve Accidentally Swallowed This Super Fab Stiletto
    by Karly Brooks
  • December 20, 2016
    I Hope Russian Hackers Don’t Expose the Secret Emails With My Real-Life Secret Boyfriend, Jason Momoa!
    by Lesley Hollingsworth
  • December 15, 2016
    A New Mother Runs Into an Old Friend Who Doesn’t Recognize Her, But It’s OK Because She’s Totally Chill About It
    by Amy Rolph
  • December 9, 2016
    The Grim Reaper is Just Your Everyday, Average Millennial
    by Andrew Melchor
  • December 3, 2016
    Dad of Newborn Girl Explains the Importance of Women’s Issues to a Table of Women at a Coffee Shop
    by Andrew Knott
  • December 2, 2016
    Jimmy Fallon’s 2017 White House Correspondents’ Dinner Speech
    by Scott Limbrick
⇦ … 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 … ⇨
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McSweeney’s is an independent nonprofit publishing company based in San Francisco.
As well as operating a daily humor website, we also publish Timothy McSweeney’s Quarterly Concern, Illustoria and an ever-growing selection of books under various imprints. You can buy all of these things from our online store. You can support us today by making a donation.

We are committed to our environment. Each year, we purchase carbon offsets commensurate with our estimate of the impact of the printing, shipping, and travel necessary to publish our books and magazines. We are continually working to minimize our impact on the planet by examining every business decision through a lens of sustainability. To support this effort, or to learn more, please write to executive director Amanda Uhle. McSweeney’s accepts no writing aided in any manner by AI. Before publishing any writing—from a letter to a book-length work—authors published at McSweeney’s will be asked to attest that AI played no part in the creation or writing of that work.
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Porthole is out now!

“A hilarious and exhilarating provocation about art-making at any cost and the gutting ruthlessness of power. Joanna Howard is a singular talent; her work is propulsive, kinetic, and laser sharp. She is a genius!”—Patrick Cottrell. Bring home Porthole today.

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