• Internet Tendency
  • The Store
  • Books Division
  • Quarterly Concern
  • The Believer
  • Donate
McSweeney’s
Internet Tendency
Daily humor almost every day since 1998.
Daily humor almost every day since 1998.
The Believer Magazine

Subscribe today to climb aboard this unstoppable train of a literary journal.

Short Imagined Monologues

Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.

  • August 27, 2012
    Paul Ryan Details His Plan for Post-Bowling Drinks
    by Rob Curran
  • August 6, 2012
    An Overeager New Dad Celebrates the Birth of His Son
    by Stephen Ornes
  • July 31, 2012
    My Semester Abroad Gives Me Ownership of this Cultural Event
    by Eric Noah Feldman
  • July 23, 2012
    The Man Who Tripped and Fell in His Living Room One Afternoon and Died
    by Jaylee Alde
  • July 16, 2012
    I am Young, Vapid, and Want to Complain
    by Genevieve A.
  • July 10, 2012
    No Matter How You Slice it, We’ve Been Stuck in This Elevator for Three Days
    by John Purcell
  • June 25, 2012
    A Mayoral Candidate Explains His Behavior at Last Night’s Debate
    by Jamie Brew
  • June 18, 2012
    An Antelope from The Lion King Wonders Why He Was Invited to the Celebration of Simba’s Birth
    by Fabian Lapham
  • June 11, 2012
    Salvador Dali, Wedding Photographer
    by Julia McCloy
  • June 5, 2012
    A Classmate Has Some Notes About the Psychedelic-Mushroom Scene in Your Short Story
    by Andrea Uptmor
  • May 29, 2012
    Willy Loman Contemplates Twittercide
    by Jason Edward Harrington
  • May 15, 2012
    A Frustrated Chief Executive Engineer Addresses His Staff Entirely Composed of Disney Imagineers
    by Liz Arcury
⇦ … 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 … ⇨
Trending 🔥
  1. June 13, 2025
    Congrats, Dipshit, You’re a Dad Now
    by Carlos Greaves
  2. June 6, 2025
    I, Saruman, Have Ended My Alliance with the Dark Lord Sauron
    by Carlos Greaves
  3. February 10, 2015
    What a Straight Man’s Favorite Musical Says About Him
    by Mara Wilson
  4. June 9, 2025
    It’s Not Going Great, but Imagine How Much Worse Things Would Be with a Woman President
    by Talia Argondezzi
Recently
  • June 18, 2025
    I Am Your Body and I Am Done Keeping Score
    by Madeleine Trebenski
  • June 18, 2025
    The Trump Playbook for Brokering Peace Between Israel and Iran
    by Dash MacIntyre
  • June 17, 2025
    I’ve Figured Out What My Mayoral Run Is Missing: I Need to Start Sexually Harassing Women
    by Jessica M. Goldstein
  • June 17, 2025
    Minutes from the Latest Meeting of the Council of Landlords
    by Grant Lease
McSweeney’s is an independent nonprofit publishing company based in San Francisco.
As well as operating a daily humor website, we also publish Timothy McSweeney’s Quarterly Concern, Illustoria and an ever-growing selection of books under various imprints. You can buy all of these things from our online store. You can support us today by making a donation.

We are committed to our environment. Each year, we purchase carbon offsets commensurate with our estimate of the impact of the printing, shipping, and travel necessary to publish our books and magazines. We are continually working to minimize our impact on the planet by examining every business decision through a lens of sustainability. To support this effort, or to learn more, please write to executive director Amanda Uhle. McSweeney’s accepts no writing aided in any manner by AI. Before publishing any writing—from a letter to a book-length work—authors published at McSweeney’s will be asked to attest that AI played no part in the creation or writing of that work.
  • Internet Tendency
  • The Store
  • Books Division
  • Quarterly Concern
  • The Believer
  • Donate
  • About Us
  • Events
  • Email Newsletter
  • Advertise
  • Store Policy
  • Contact Us
  • Internships
  • Submission Guidelines
Copyright © 1998–2025, McSweeney’s Literary Arts Fund.
All Rights Reserved.
Search Magnifying Glass
  • Internet Tendency
  • The Store
  • Books Division
  • Quarterly Concern
  • The Believer
  • Donate
 

Porthole is out now!

“A hilarious and exhilarating provocation about art-making at any cost and the gutting ruthlessness of power. Joanna Howard is a singular talent; her work is propulsive, kinetic, and laser sharp. She is a genius!”—Patrick Cottrell. Bring home Porthole today.

×